BiZhen Seeto | 87

BiZhen Seeto immigrated from China over thirty years ago and worked many jobs until being able to open her own daycare in San Francisco. She was able to serve many families in the city with her daycare. She is grounded and in her life “nothing extraordinary” has happened so far. But she enjoys time with her family, caring for her physical health, and binge watching her favorite shows.

This interview is in Cantonese, and the translation is below. Subtitles on the video are coming soon.

Interview date: 8/26/21

Interviewed by: Karen Yuan

Referred by: Wanda Liu

Translation of Interview

by Linguaficient

Interviewer:  I will start my interview with you now.  Can you tell me your full name and age?

BiZhen Seeto: I was born in 1934 and my name is Wong Seeto BiZhen.

Interviewer: And what’s your age?

BiZhen Seeto:   I am 87.

Interviewer: How would you introduce yourself to someone who wants to know you?

BiZhen Seeto: I landed in San Francisco in 1988, from Guangzhou, China.  I was at a loss when I first arrived. I wasn’t sure what I could do to make a living since I was already in my 50s.  I found work as a domestic helper. Then I worked at the dumpling factory wrapping dumplings. My old colleagues from Guangzhou referred me to the factory. I also cleaned houses for families. I took whatever jobs I could find.  I didn’t know how to sew.  After some time, my daughter expressed that this was not a solution.   All these jobs were not stable.  She asked me why didn’t I apply for a license to open a daycare.  And so, I did and ran my own childcare for 11 years until I retired.

It had been a pretty good experience running a home childcare. One of the parents worked at the immigration department. This couple has two children. I took care of their first born, and then the second, from the start to the close of my childcare and until they graduated from elementary school. Their mom would drop them off at school, and my husband would pick them up from school.  I stayed at the childcare to watch the other children. It’s a really good job.

I got my bills paid, and I also served the community. I looked after the children so the parents could go to work with peace of mind; I think that was how I helped the community.

Our lives became steady.

I took care of kids till they started school. There was one kid who would complain about having to go home after school.  He lived a few streets from my house. When he reached the intersection of my house on the way home, he would stop and not budge. He said: “I want to go to granny’s house to eat because her food tastes better. Ours is not as good.”

His dad could do anything but drop him off at my house every day for dinner. He would come back later to pick him up.

Even now, when I run into these parents, they will give me gifts of money. During the holidays, I receive many presents also. Everyone is so sweet!  All the parents are wonderful.

Interviewer:     That’s great. Why did your family immigrate to San Francisco?

BiZhen Seeto: Because of the sister paper (F4 visa) and my brother was here. Back in those days, life was not very good in China. My family lived in a village. I moved to the city, Guangzhou, alone. Anyway, I did have some admiration for America, I think.  So, I decided to come.

In the beginning, we had no directions. After we settled down, a friend told us about applying for Section 8. It wasn’t too difficult to call the office to apply. I got a notification after 2 weeks that there was something available. Without much delay, I retired from taking care of babies and moved into this place. It has been over 20 years already.

Interviewer: What do you enjoy about living in SF?  Why do you think living in SF is the best?

BiZhen Seeto: The weather in San Francisco is good. There are a lot of Chinese here. I think it’s really nice weather.  Everything else is good. Everything including social welfare. Right?

I came to America with my siblings. A younger sister and an older brother; 4 of us in total. They went to Oklahoma, a smaller state. When they saw me doing quite well in San Francisco; they decided to join me here with their families.  Both of their families.  They bought houses, and everyone is doing well. 

My nephew works at the airport.

My brother brought up his children well. They went to college; now they work in the computer industry, and they live comfortably.

I am also doing okay, even though I am on my own. My husband died more than a decade ago. He had asthma and he was 8 years older than me. He passed away, oh, 15 years ago, going on 16 years. I’m 80 plus now. I have quite a few health problems, and I thought I wouldn’t have too long to live after my husband. But years passed, I am still here. I have asthma, adhesive capsulitis, hypertension, and recently my blood sugar is high so maybe it's diabetes. Whatever I’m tested for, I got it.

Interviewer:     Do you have to take many kinds of medications?

BiZhen Seeto:   Yes.

Since the end of last year, I have been taking classes from Ms. Liu. In the beginning, my son worried that Ms. Liu would have a hard time teaching me because I knew nothing.

Teacher Liu called to check on me one day and my son happened to be around.  My son said to

Teacher Liu: “Teaching my mom must be like pulling an ox up a tree, very difficult. What is your strategy?” 

Ms. Liu jokingly said: “Just take it slow.”

BiZhen Seeto:   Even though I have many ailments, I learned to be patient like Teacher Liu. She taught me how to use the phone which my son gave me. First, I learned how to make calls, and answered calls, and I didn’t know how to use WeChat very well. But I know how to use it now. At first, I used a simple phone. Later she suggested upgrading to a phone with more features and functions. I said no thanks. I didn’t want it. I wouldn’t be able to handle it. 

It’s different now. I have learned a lot from Teacher Liu. I know how to use Meitu Pic, collage, translation, and I can look up maps and check bus routes to get to places.

Teacher Liu taught us all these things.

Interviewer:     Isn’t that great!

BiZhen Seeto:   I learned a lot.  There are fun things to do.  Like the collage apps. I can remove people I don’t want or add images I like to create a collage. It is so fun.  Learning new things can help battle the evil of disease.  When I’m busy learning, I forget all about my pain, like my frozen shoulder pain, or my breathing problems.  If you engage yourself in learning, your body will reap many health benefits.  I owe Teacher Liu a great deal.

Interviewer:     Do you do exercise to reduce stress?

BiZhen Seeto:   Yes.  I do the “5 elements Health Exercise” every morning.  It helps me stay healthy.

I was the heaviest at 148 pounds two years ago.  Now I am around 120. My weight came down gradually, through the exercise regime and walking.  I take my medication on schedule, and I try to drink more water.

I think this routine and practice enabled me to live longer.  I thought I would follow my late husband years ago.

Cardiologist Dr. Kwan Chuk Wing said we have to walk at least 30 minutes a day. I try to follow his advice. Because of the pandemic, I couldn’t go out for walks. I make trips slowly from the living room to my bedroom and bedroom to the living room.  Sometimes I use the walker, and sometimes I use the cane. I have to walk slowly because my knees hurt.

Interviewer:           What were the places you liked to go before the pandemic?

BiZhen Seeto:   Before the pandemic, sometimes I played a few games of mahjong at the Chinese Association.  Sometimes I would go shopping or get some groceries by myself.  There’s nothing special to do. At my place, I like to catch up with some drama series.

Occasionally the neighbors will get together, and we go eat dim sum.

Interviewer:     Do your children and relatives visit you?

BiZhen Seeto:   My daughters and grandkids visit me on the weekends.  Sometimes they pick me up and they drive me to eat dim sum. I feel very satisfied.

Interviewer:     Is there anything you’ve experienced in your life that compares to the COVID-19 pandemic, and how did you deal with it?

BiZhen Seeto:   Right now, this pandemic… I do have some worries. I’m concerned about my kids and grandkids. My daughter works at Kaiser. She is a “five organ system” [Ear, Nose, Throat, Mouth, Eyes] technician. She is a professional in intubation and emergency care. 

Covid-19 aligns with her line of work. I am a bit worried about her.

Interviewer:     What are you most looking forward to?

BiZhen Seeto:   Looking forward to? I am doing pretty well. I get benefits from the government. I am hoping for better health. I try my best to take care of my health, because I don’t want my kids to worry about me. I hope I can stay self-reliant and independent. I have in-home service to help me with cleaning, cooking, and grocery shopping.

I have many health issues. I am not hoping for a cure, I understand time is not on my side either. If the condition stabilizes, I am fine with that. I hope the pain doesn’t increase, and the disease doesn’t progress. My liver is full of cysts. It’s quite scary looking at the images. A lot of cysts on my liver.

My specialist assured me that they usually don’t develop into cancers, there’s no need to worry. Every year I take the imaging test, I see more cysts.

Interviewer:     It’s important to monitor the condition then.

BiZhen Seeto:         The specialist doesn’t recommend surgeries due to my age despite so many cysts.  I have to watch my diet and try to avoid triggering foods like shrimp and crab. Try to eat less of these.

Interviewer:     And foods like mango!

BiZhen Seeto:   If my condition doesn’t change, I will be happy. To be able to live to this age, I feel like this is a bonus already. My husband passed in his 70s, but I am in my 80s and still living. I am pretty satisfied.

Interviewer:     Do you think this city has done enough to reflect on the pandemic?

BiZhen Seeto:   San Francisco has done a fairly good job. We fared a lot better than other states and cities. There is a large population of Chinese in San Francisco, and they are aware of what to do to keep themselves safe from covid -19.

Frankly, there are other problems in the community that scare me more, like robberies. My kids told me to stay at home for safety's sake.  It’s not worth going out and getting beaten up. I am truly afraid of this situation.

I hope the government can focus on this problem and deal with it. Don’t you agree?

We have to be proactive in taking care of our own safety; and yes of course the government has to pay attention to this also…

We should try to avoid unnecessary outings. Sometimes I don’t go out in a whole week.

My kids used to pick me up in their car to go for dim sum.  Earlier on, we would go once in a while, but I haven’t had dim sum for more than a year already. We went a few times the year before.

Before the pandemic, my four children and I got together every holiday. I felt the warmth and closeness of our family.

My children care about me a lot. I am very grateful for their obedience. Once I say something, it’s final.

My children all listen to me.

Interviewer:     If you could give advice to younger people, what would it be?

BiZhen Seeto:   Concerning what?

Interviewer:     About being human.

BiZhen Seeto:   To be human, you need to be well rounded. Don’t think about what’s petty. First, be just, be diligent and work hard.  My children work for the government. All four of them. 

I hope my children will teach their kids well, and I do believe they know what they are doing.

It is important that children are taught not to do evil, not to disturb society, but to be content and behave properly.

I have 8 grandkids, all but 2 are working.

Interviewer:     What has been surprising to you about getting older?

BiZhen Seeto:   Nothing really. We just live an ordinary and uneventful life. 

Unlike others, nothing extraordinary happened so far.  We live a stable and steady life. We are content. That’s OK. I don’t have too high an expectation.

Interviewer:     How has technology changed your life on a personal level?  For example, the computer classes you are taking.

BiZhen Seeto:   I am very pleased with myself.  For the level of computer skills I have achieved. I can do many things on the computer now. I can navigate the Meitu pic apps on my own. When I am free, I play around with my photos. I can experiment with my photos with flowers and plants, to create collages; and I also do photo edits with the apps. 

This activity helps me spend my time, takes my mind off my pains, and to fight off my ailments. This is a profound experience.

I found myself very interested in learning these.

I didn’t think that…. [Phone rings]….  Sorry I have a call coming….

“Hello.  I am in the middle of something, I will call you back later. Ok. Bye bye.”

It was my younger sister.  My younger sister called me.

Interviewer:     What would you say are the principles that you live by?

BiZhen Seeto:   Huh?

Interviewer:     Principles in life?

BiZhen Seeto:   [Sigh]  I am too old to mull over it.  First off, is to keep your body healthy.  You are in charge of doing more exercise, drink plenty of water. It’s the most important.  Do your best to maintain your health. Health is more important than anything else.  That’s how I look at it.

Anyway, you don’t need a lot of money to have a decent life.

I don’t ask for much of anything else.

My retirement funds are limited so I’m getting SSI and other benefits. I am very content. This sense of contentment makes me feel good.

I have no other wants.

Interviewer:     Nowadays, what do you do to make yourself happy?

BiZhen Seeto:   When my children and grandchildren get together with me, which is the happiest time.

Before the pandemic, we often had parties with over a few dozen family members. We had a great time taking pictures, making, and eating sushi.

As a senior what more can I ask for?

Most important is that everyone is healthy and happy. Don’t pick on each other. Then it will be okay. Among siblings, we should try to be considerate and bear with each other. We should stick together. Have open conversation when situations arise.

That’s all I ask.

But…..  again I emphasize that maintaining a healthy body is the most important thing.

So that my children don’t have to worry about me, and less suffering from my ailments.

I watch my diet, drink plenty of water, and I set limits to how much I eat.  This means I don’t eat till I am totally full.  Eating too much can make me sick.  That’s my personal experience.

80 % full is good enough. 

It doesn’t have to be something fancy or special.  We need to eat more healthful foods like vegetables and fruits.

Interviewer:     Now that most people are vaccinated, have you started to have gatherings?

BiZhen Seeto:   NOPE! We don’t dare.

We used to have parties at my daughter’s house.

Her house is spacious.  The house has a pool table, a few rooms: living room, dining room.  The house can accommodate a few groups of our families. There’s also a computer room, and room for singing Karaoke. Every holiday, we meet at the house.

Each family brought dishes to show off.  Dishes were prepared in different ways, for example: braised, stewed, pan fried, deep fried.  Some brought steamed buns…..  What a blast we had!

Some sang, some played mahjong, and the kids played computer games.  Others played pool if they so desired.  There were some things for everyone because my daughter’s house has plenty of room to roam.

Sounds good, right?

And it was nice they came to pick me up and send me home in their car.

What more can I ask for [phone rings…..]  Must be a delivery.

 “Hello, hello…” 

Phone: [Scammer calling on the phone]

Interviewer:           This is a scam call.  Please Hang up

BiZhen Seeto:         Ok.  I ended the call.

Interviewer:           It’s a scam call.  Don’t answer it

BiZhen Seeto:   It happens a lot.  Sometimes they claim they are from the consulate, sometimes from SSA.  Some say my Hong Kong bank account has been frozen. I only transited through Hong Kong on the way here and I never had an account there. All nonsense. 

Interviewer:     Yeah, you are right, these are con artists.

You live in SF, correct?

BiZhen Seeto: Yes.

Interviewer:     Before the pandemic, did you get out of the apartment and walk to the nearby parks to do exercise?  You are probably not doing that now, I assume.

BiZhen Seeto:   Not very often. I am not very mobile. My knees hurt and I have osteoporosis. I have shortness of breath when I walk. 

I suffer from asthma, so sometimes I cough. If people hear it now, they may try to avoid me. I am aware of that. Only my family will understand, but not others.

Interviewer:     What is the most defining moment in your life?

BiZhen Seeto:   Defining moment in my life?  What do you mean?  I don’t understand.

Interviewer:     Moments that are crucial, for example: when you got married, or when you immigrated here, or when your grandkid was born, those moments that are important to you.

BiZhen Seeto:   As long as all my grandkids were born healthy with no complications, that’s ok with me.

I had given birth several times, I don’t see it a big deal.  In general, I am not an anxious person.

Interviewer:     If you could give advice to younger people like me, what would it be?

BiZhen Seeto:   Huh, for you?  Study hard, strive for improvement, and contribute to communities, specifically for young people.  Again, studying hard can lead to a better life for you, and contribute to society. Isn’t that good?

First and foremost, you have to stay healthy, that’s the most important. You with me?

If you have a healthy body, you will be ok.

Interviewer:     Thank you so much for your time and advice.  I have learned a lot from you. You have such a cheerful outlook on life.

BiZhen Seeto:   Yeah, even though I have many health issues, I don’t dread being sick or dying.  It doesn’t matter when my time comes.  I am living on borrowed time.

That’s how I feel.

You own your body.  Worrying is not going to help.  Correct?

On the contrary, being joyful, relaxing, and cheerfulness is good. And don’t think too much. 

That’s why I like to watch lighthearted shows.

Interviewer:     What are your favorite dramas to follow?

BiZhen Seeto:   Me, um I like….one is   [inaudible] and the others are period comedies.  Period costume comedy is my favorite.

I like period costume drama series.

Sometimes I binge watch and forget to eat my meals.  Hehe….

Interviewer:     What do you cook for yourself?

BiZhen Seeto:   Whatever my daughter brought or cooked, I will eat it.  I am not picky.  As long as there are vegetables and stuff.  I cut back on rice recently.

            [Phone rings……]

Interviewer:     I have asked all my questions.

BiZhen Seeto:   [phone rings again]

“Let me call you back!”

Interviewer:     You are a busy lady; so many people are trying to call you.

BiZhen Seeto:   It’s my daughter. My children call me every day, to ask how I am doing and what’s for dinner.

Interviewer:     Do they bring you food every day?

BiZhen Seeto:   No. They just ask me what I am eating. They do bring me soup or stews on weekends.  That’s why I feel very content already.  Hey, someone does the cooking for me!

What else can an old lady ask for?

Everyone has to go to work; I can’t expect too much from them.

Getting a phone call from them is good enough.  Visiting me in person is not necessary.

Interviewer:     I won’t keep you any longer.  I’d better let you call your daughter and sister back.

BiZhen Seeto:   I don’t mind it at all.

Interviewer:     Thank you for your time.  We will chat next time.

BiZhen Seeto:   I appreciate you showing your care for the elderly.  Thank you.

Interviewer:     Wish you health and strength.  Bye bye.

BiZhen Seeto:   Thank you, thank you.  I wish you a bright future with unlimited possibilities. Thank you.  Bye bye.