Felipa Frías | 90

Felipa Frías came to San Francisco from Mexico for work. She worked as a housekeeper and now lives in an apartment building for older adults and keeps herself busy with activities and checking in on people. Her close family used to live in San Francisco but have moved back to Mexico and she looks back on the time with them, her daughter and granddaughters, as some of the happiest. She loves to travel and especially to see historical sites. She bravely shares how hard it was to lose one of her daughters.

This interview is in Spanish and the translation is below.

Interview date: 4/6/21

Interviewed by: Anna Chodos

Referred by: Sarah Arnold, Little Brothers Friends of the Elderly

Felipa Frías on her balcony. Photo by Anna Chodos.

Translation of audio interview

by Linguaficient.

Anna Chodos: [00:00:00] What’s your name and how old are you?

Felipa Frías My name is Felipa Frías. I’m ninety years old.

Anna Chodos: How would you describe yourself to others?

Felipa Frías: Myself? Well, I am a very quiet person. I talk very little. When people talk to me, I just reply, “Good.” I believe I am someone who was raised well.

Anna Chodos: When did you arrive in San Francisco and why?

Felipa Frías: I arrived in San Francisco on April 15th, 1980, due to the need there is in [00:01:00]Mexico, like all families that don’t have a way to make a living. So, I came to San Francisco to work.

Anna Chodos: And what did you do for a living?

Felipa Frías: I was a housekeeper, sorry. My tongue gets twisted.

Anna Chodos: What do you like about living here in San Francisco?

Felipa Frías: That the temperature is not hot. I prefer chilly weather over hot weather.

Anna Chodos: As a community, what could we do to make San Francisco better, a better place to live?

Felipa Frías: I feel bad saying this, but I feel a lot of pity seeing all the people who are homeless.

Anna Chodos: ok, now [00:02:00] I will ask you about COVID. Well, when we were not...or before. When we were not confined, where did you like to go?

Felipa Frías: I am sorry, but I really liked to gamble in the casinos. When I was young and worked, I would go every week. Then I only went once a year. There was a person here that would take us twice during the summer.

Anna Chodos: Have you experienced anything in your life that was like this pandemic?

Felipa Frías: No. Never... I had never seen a disease like this one and we might not have been ready to handle it. [00:03:00] It was extremely hard for me to be in lockdown.

Anna Chodos: Can you tell me why?

Felipa Frías: Because I could not go walking. I used to love walking along an avenue that is behind this building. Or I enjoyed going to the store just to hang out so that my mind cleared up from being in here. Now I don’t do it. But my life is not boring to me because I listen to the radio to have some noise at home.

I used to have a lot of plants. I loved cleaning them. Now I rest more.

Anna Chodos: What is a typical day for you [00:04:00] and how did it change with the pandemic?

Felipa Frías: It changed a lot because we don’t go to the park anymore. We do not go out anymore to visit my family in Fairfield like I used to. So, things changed a lot this year.

Anna Chodos: What do you expect from the future nowadays?

Felipa Frías: I expect what God has in store for me. I have a daughter in Mexico, and I want to go visit her.

Anna Chodos: Was there anything surprising regarding the way in which the community responded to COVID?

Felipa Frías: There was. Over here, the [00:05:00] manager takes good care of us. He tried to be very careful that we did not go out, and that nobody came to visit us so that we could be safe here.

Anna Chodos: If you could give any advice for young people, which would it be?

Felipa Frías: The first thing I would tell them to not ever get depressed over anything. Because depression is really sad, and you have many other ways to pass the time. I do books with word games. I watch TV, watching shows that educate me; I try to see what people do in other countries when they go on vacation, [00:06:00] I do that to pass the time and I... I would not like seeing someone being depressed because I have seen it already. I had a friend that just... she said... she would come here and dance. I used to play CDs for her to dance and she did it happily but after three months she got depressed and did not want to come back to visit me. She did not want anything, and she passed away because of depression; so, I would not want to see depressed people. Youngsters have a lot of reasons to live and to be entertained with.

And old people do too. If you want to pass the time, there are many ways to do it.

Anna Chodos: Is there anything you have found surprising of being an elderly person or of growing older?

Felipa Frías: No, no [00:07:00] My motto is to let whatever must happen, happen.

Anna Chodos: What are the main values you live by?

Felipa Frías: The first thing is that God gave me my life, so I want to take care of myself until he takes me.

Anna Chodos: I see you have a strong faith in God. That it is important to you.

Felipa Frías: Yes...

Anna Chodos: If you could be in any moment from the present or the past you can imagine, which...

Felipa Frías: I would have loved to be a nurse. But I did not get an education.

Anna Chodos: How many years did you go to school? A total of three.

Felipa Frías: [00:08:00] Yes, in elementary. Uhm, I missed a lot of schooling. [laughs] In my province there was nothing after first, second and third grades. There were no more grades at school.

Anna Chodos: Why would you have liked to be a nurse?

Felipa Frías: Because I really like helping people. When I was young, I liked to help the elderly.

Anna Chodos: What have you done recently that made you happy?

Felipa Frías: Going to Chicago. I saw it rain, I saw it snow and I saw the sun shining. I saw the [00:09:00] the three things I like in life.

Anna Chodos: And why did you go?

Felipa Frías: I went to visit the place, as a vacation because I really wanted to see Chicago, you know?

Anna Chodos: Yes, are there any other cities you like?

Felipa Frías: There are. I would like to go to New York to see the Statue of Liberty. I would like to go to Washington to see the White House, historic stuff. Because, when I traveled in Mexico, I liked to visit historic places related to what happened in Mexico.

Anna Chodos: What have you recently done for someone else that made you happy?

Felipa Frías: At my age [00:10:00] very little. I had a friend who lived on the third floor, and she loved going out, not being home and she would tell me: “Let’s go, take me to this place that you know.” I used to travel by bus by myself and I knew several of the routes in San Francisco really well. So, I would ask her: “Where do you want to go?” On Saturdays I was always ready and asked her where she wanted to go, and I took her wherever she wanted. Now I cannot go out anymore. I am tired. My feet do not work anymore.

Anna Chodos: Last question. [00:11:00] Can you describe one of the most defining moments of your life?

Felipa Frías: When I saw my family here in San Francisco. I had my two daughters here with my granddaughters. Those were the best moments I had here in San Francisco. But one of them left us and the other one lives in Mexico, and so do my granddaughters. I would have liked to have my family in San Francisco with me.

Anna Chodos: How long were you all together?

Felipa Frías: From ‘86 to ‘91. After that, only my daughter who left us, stayed. But, I am sorry [00:12:00] if I have a tough time saying this, she used to drink a lot, she changed a lot here in San Francisco and I don’t really like to talk about that.

Anna Chodos: I understand it is difficult. Thanks for sharing.

Felipa Frías: She died of cancer. Because she used to drink so much. I have had a really sad life.

Anna Chodos: Well, Ms. Frías, thank you so much for talking to me.

Felipa Frías: Thank you, it was a pleasure to meet you.